Lead By Faith & Not By Fears!

We all go through things, we often question Why Me? Why do I have to go through the things Iam going through when others around me are happy? Why can't things ever go my way? You ask yourself a thousands questions which you will never know the answers for but you still ask yourself instead of praying so God can deliver the answers you need to move on. 

One thing I learned is that God will never put you through things he knew you wouldn't be able to handle. I used to be so mad at God, asking why am I going through the BS that Iam going through. Didn't he want to see me happy? Didn't he want me to be good and smile instead of crying? I was hurt but as soon as I stop blaming him, I started being patient and trusted why he was putting me through the things I went through and the more I trusted him, I found my purpose. He knew that with my struggles and pains I can share them and inspire others. I believe I went through not having any confidence and a messed up relationship where I knew my worth but was too afraid to leave to birth Confidence Is You. 

So stop questioning God on why you are going through the issues you are going through. Believe there is a reason and at the end of it all, it will all be worth it. Why are you rushing? What's the rush? Greatness Takes Time! Why would you want to rush what God has plan for you? I find myself at times rushing things but I learned that when things happen when it's suppose to, it feels so much better. Direction is so much more important than speed. Many are going nowhere fast. When you rush for things to happen, it won't happen. 

Don't you think that the reason why things are not working out in your favor is because you're rushing? Ummm so pray, be patient and just wait for God to deliver it. 

You're worth it and the things you may be going through doesn't define who you are. Let the things that you are going through make you stronger, let it be motivation to kick ass and get back up. SOLID WOMEN DON'T CRUMBLE! You have the power to overcome anything and everything that comes your way. I go through things but I remember the stress it used to give me in the past so now I just pray even in the midst of crying, I PRAY! . I know it's a reason why Iam going through it, I may not know the reason why but it's a reason. 

Lead by faith and not by fear My Confident Dolls. Whatever comes, let it come. Whatever stays, let it stay and whatever goes, let it go and let God. Don't stress yourself because something didn't come, or this person didn't stay in your life or you had something and it left. Just let it be, the things that are meant for you to have, it will never go nowhere. Sometimes we receive things as lessons, it comes to just teach us a lesson and than leaves so we can learn from it. 

Wipe your tears, stop worrying and living in fears. Stay focus on yourself and never never give up. Just know what is meant to be will be My Confident Queens. FEARS ARE STORIES WE TELL OURSELVES, LET FAITH HANDLE IT. 

       A Confident Love From Me To You

                      Xoxo, Yanika 

Sometimes The Person You Want, Doesn't Deserve You!

You love him? You care for him? You pray for him and want the best for him but does he want or feel the same for you too. You fight for this relationship on your own because it's obvious he shows you signs that he isn't interested and fighting to meet you half way isn't something that he wants to do. Why stay? Oh I know you believe he will change and see how good of a women you are. It doesn't matter how could of a women you are, it doesn't matter if you cook, clean, wash his boxers. It doesn't matter if you're educated with a great job on your grind. Nothing matters because if he isn't into you, there is nothing that you can do to make him be in love with you or feel the same way you do. Being pretty doesn't keep a man, Hell being a GOOD woman barely keeps a man. The only things that keeps a man is a man that wants to be kept. 

I was once that girl, if you read my previous blogs, I share a lot about my past. I trusted him, loved him and would do anything for him. Everytime he f*cked up, I gave him another chance because I honestly thought he would change and be the man that I wanted him to be. When I was in the house cooking, cleaning, doing everything for him, he was out cheating, doing him. But what's crazy is that I knew that, I knew he wasn't feeling the same way I was. I was giving more to the relationship than he was, I gave it my all and didn't even get an "I love you" back. I knew it was over after 2 years of being with him but I stayed an additional 3 years because I "thought" he would change. 

I know you know you deserve better, I know deep down inside the sh*t you settling for isn't what you want. I know that you may feel that things will change but what about your happiness? Doesn't your happiness matters? Aren't you worthy to be treated the way you are meant to be treated? Sometimes the person you want, doesn't deserve you. You fight and pray for something that may never happen. At times you know they don't deserve you but you believe and have faith that one day things will change. 

I've seen too many women lose their sense while waiting for a man to come to his. It hurts me because I know how you feel, it's not easy waking up with an ache in your heart all because he doesn't love you. You start to lose yourself and not focus on what's important which the most important thing you need to focus on is YOU. Trust me I know the feeling, while I was losing focus on myself, school and everything I needed to be doing, NOTHING CHANGED! I even didn't want to work because I didn't want him to lose him, but once again that sh*t didn't matter.

All this time you are wasting trying to make him love you and be with you, that time could of been spent doing things to make you better and accomplish the goals you have for yourself. I wasted so much time and despite the fact I am in a place in my life where Iam content, it took me awhile to realize that I WAS WORTH IT! It took me awhile to realize that I mattered and my goals is mattered as well and I needed to do what I had to do for myself. 

I have a man that loves me now and yesterday (June 17th), we made two years of being together. I never even thought of falling in love again and being able to love someone else. I was broken and I was damaged but he knew I was worth it and was patient with me and most of all my heart. I never thought that someone can love all of me and appreciate me but there was someone out there waiting for me to give me exactly what I deserved. Falling in love with someone for the first time is cool but falling in love with someone everyday and they feel the same way is amazing. My Confident Dolls, you are worthy of the same love.

               ( Kisses To My Love)

Stop thinking that you have to settle and you aren't worthy of being loved by someone. Stop settling, praying and wishing that HE changes. If you have to put yourself last and put him first while crying and fighting for him to love you, HE ISN'T THE ONE! Let it go, Let HIM go. Do what makes you happy and do what's best for you. Stop putting yourself last for love, you were born to be first. If he loves you, trust me you will know. You will feel it in your heart and soul by the way he makes you feel. 

No relationship is perfect, you will go through the obstacles but when it's worth it, both of you guys will fight for it. My boyfriend and I have our issues but the love we have for each other is so strong that it surpass whatever issue we have. I did make a promise to myself, if things changes and it isn't the same with him than I will do what's best for me. I will fight for us but once I feel as if he isn't fighting back for us, I will let him go. No matter how much I love him, I refuse to settle for what I know that I don't deserve. I have faith in him, I have faith in us but things do happen in life so I have to be realistic. He is the best I ever had so all I can do is pray for us. 

You're worth it, YOU KNOW IT!!! Start  believing in it and stop settling when you know you deserve more. Don't waste your time on someone that wouldn't give you the time of day. My Confident Queens, Be Confident, Be You & Know Your Worth. 

    A Confident Love From Me To You. 

                      Xoxo, Yanika 

Fashionista On A Budget Featuring ME!

You don't have to be millionaire in order to be fashionable, you can definitely be fashionable with a pair of jeans which cost you $3.99 and a T-shirt that cost you $1.00. Being fashionable doesn't come with a price tag. I used to spend lots of money on clothes and the latest pair of shoes just so I could be, “Fly." But then I thought about it and said to myself, spending over a $100 on an outfit just so I can be fashionable is ridiculous. So I gave myself a budget and told myself I would shop around it. Now Iam not cheap, if I see something out of my budget and I love it, I would definitely get it. It's ok to splurge on yourself from time to time, but I am more mindful of buying things that I do need and would wear, instead of buying and spending money on things I won't wear, but got it because it was cute. If Iam not in love with it, I won't purchase it. However, if Iam unsure and I go home and think about it, then guess what, I would go back to get it. 

I wanted to come up with a blog that shows you that you can be on a budget and still be fashionable. We are all on a budget and we all have responsibilities that doesn't allow us to go over board with shopping and that's ok. As I said before I used to spend money on clothes like there was no tomorrow and not even wear certain things that I used to buy. It was getting out of control so I put myself on a budget. Honestly it was the best decision that I did for myself, not only am I saving more money but Iam also learning to be responsible on buying things that I need and not want. 

                       ( All 3 Outfits Under $100) 

Remember, you don’t have to spend a million bucks to be fashionable. We often get caught up in wearing the hottest labels thinking that it makes the outfit that we risk our bank accounts. It is okay to not own a Fendi bag, Chanel sandals, and Cartier bracelet. The labels do not make the outfit, you do. Now there is nothing wrong with owning luxury items, however, do not let it consume you. Once a month, splurge on a designer handbag or designer shoes. However, do not use your last to own these items.

~Jacket: Thrift $6.99

~Top:Forever 21 $9.99

~Jeans;Forever 21 $21.99

~Shoes: Call It Spring $42.99 

The best thing you could do when shopping on a budget is catch major sales, explore coupon-suzy.com, and scope the clearance section. That’s right, the CLEARANCE SECTION!! While it may not be as organized as new arrivals (which I think they do on purpose), the clearance section still has cute items for a discounted price. Most stores take an extra percentage off the clearance price, meaning you’ll save a ton of money. Especially if you’re shopping out of season! Buy your winter items in the summer and your summer items in the winter; you would be surprised how much money you save. Keep in mind, dollars do add up.

~Dress: Forever 21 $27.50

~Bag: Aldo On Sale For $14.99

~Shoes: Call It Spring $42.99 

A lot of people always ask me where do I shop? I wouldn't say Iam the most fashionable person but I wear what I like and what compliments my body. It wasn't always this way; I use to wear baggy jeans and big T-shirts to hide what was underneath my clothes. I didn't always like the fact that I was a big girl, so I never wore anything nice because I didn't think I would look pretty in it. It's either I spent a lot of money to have nice things so others could see I had the latest or just buy clothes that would cover what I was feeling inside. Well now confidence is me and I will wear anything that I like. My Confident Dolls remember Be Confident, Be You. Don't stop from wearing something you love only because you are afraid of what others may say. You love it, you're confident in it, then wear it.

Dress~Forever 21 $19.90

Honestly my favorite store is Forever 21, they really need to give me a lifetime of discount or a deal because 80% or even more of my clothes I buy from Forever 21. Not only is it reasonale but it's fashionable and it compliments my body. It's hard being curvy at the bottom and finding jeans to fit just right, for a very long time I would search for a brand to have the perfect pair of jeans for me and Forever 21 jeans feels like heaven on me. From tops, to bathing suits to dresses, I wear it all from Forever 21. The material isn't cheap as some people may think due to the prices being reasonable, to me the material is good and I look GOOD in it. I also shop at Lane Bryant, Old Navy, H&M & Stores online as in Boohoo Official and Asos. 

~Dress: Forever 21 $27.50

~Shoes: Call It Spring: $39.99 

~Earrings: Aldo $9.99 

I also look for inspiration for different looks, I learned to come out my comfort zone. I never used to wear color such as pink, orange, yellow etc. I just felt that it wouldn't look nice on me but what I also learned is the not having the confidence that I needed to be myself, made me feel this way. You have to be confident within yourself and be who you are. If you see something that you would love to wear then Guess what? Pick out your size, buy it, put it on & wear it. Stop thinking you aren't beautiful enough to wear certain things or certain colors. 

~Top: Forever 21 $10.99

~Jeans: Forever 21 $24.90

~Sandals: Old Navy $12.95

~Bag: H&M (Borrowed From My Sister)

~Cardigan: Old Navy On Sale $6.99

Be You, Be Confident and Be the Fashionable Queen that you are. Don't look at others and wish you can wear what they have on. Put your confidence on which in my opinion should be on 24/7 and wear what you want to wear. Do what's makes you happy!!! 

  

 A confident love from Me to you. 

         Xoxo, Yanika & Kayla 

Flaws & All, Love Yourself!

Hello My Confident Dolls, It's been awhile since I've written a blog. I took some time off so I can focus on my final papers and exams in school but it is all over now and daily blogs will be updated weekly. I hope everything has been good on your side and if not I hope you're holding on to your faith because things will get better. 

Lately, I've been seeing a lot of post of girls wanting to get plastic surgery to look their best. Why is that? Is getting a bigger butt, bigger breast, a flatter stomach make you beautiful? Is going through surgery worth it? Why can't you just accept who you are and love every part of you? Don't get me wrong, we all have flaws and none of us are perfect. But one thing that I am doing each and everyday is loving myself more than I love my flaws. My flaws doesn't define who I am and I am not less of a person because of my flaws. 

I've said it before, my stomach is not something I feel at times makes me beautiful but Iam not going to go to drastic measures to get rid of it such as getting plastic surgery. My stomach is part of me and I love who I am. I will never hate myself to the point I will hurt myself just so I can look absolutely beautiful. Your flaws doesn't deny your beauty or your worth. You have to love your flaws just as much as you love yourself. 

If you focus on your flaws you will think negatively about yourself and than you will want to get things done to yourself just so you can feel beautiful. How about doing it in a way that is safe and at the end of it all you will see the results you want? Iam talking about exercising and eating right, that is a way in which you won't put yourself in harm and in the midst of it all work on yourself to become a better version of yourself. 

When you look at yourself, don't forget God made you. YOU ARE ENOUGH! I know some of you love to wear makeup, wear extensions etc but at the end of the day wearing those things doesn't show your real beauty. Society plays a big role in why we don't feel beautiful being our authentic self because they portray someone that is beautiful being a certain size and looking a certain way. 

Society screams "Be Superficial", but never tell us to be original and to be ourselves. I had to learn for many years there was nothing wrong with loving who I was and being the person that I wanted to be. Society is truly the reason why I pretended to be someone else just so I can satisfy others for many years.  My Confident Dolls, pretending to be someone else will not make you happy, it will only hurt you in the process of it all. 

Yes we all have flaws but I want you to love yourself with having those flaws. Regardless of having any flaws you are still beautiful, I want you to believe that you are. It took awhile for me to believe it but I knew I wanted to be happy and not pretend to be someone else anymore. As I said before, my stomach isn't going to make me hate myself. 

Last week when I was in Florida, as I was getting dressed. I took a few minutes to stare at my body and take time to truly admire my body. Of course looking at my stomach made me think I wasn't beautiful for a second but then I took my phone out and took some pictures. I looked in the mirror and I was snapping pictures, I told myself "I Love You" over a dozen times. Iam not going to let my stomach stop me from loving who I am as well as being who I am. 

Yes it is my flaw but I am still beautiful, I am strong, I am powerful, I am a Queen and I will not allow society or anyone made me think differently or negatively about myself ANYMORE. Yes I have a big stomach, I won't say I will have one forever because I know I am going to make the changes that I need to do which I am doing now to become much more healthier but I will never stop loving who I am because of my flaws. 

My Confident Dolls, I just want you to know that you are beautiful, you are worth it and you do matter. Don't let anyone tell you different, don't harm yourself just so you can feel beautiful. I know they say when you want change, you must do what is necessary to make that change. When it comes to your body and yourself, don't put it through harm. Your body is a temple, love it, cherish it, appreciate it, just the way it is. 

   A Confident Love From Me To You. 

                      Xoxo, Yanika