I remember from a young age being bullied by other girls about my weight, not having a perm and not being able to talk English properly since French was my first language. I first started experiencing bullying when I moved to NY from Canada, I remember being 7 years old and other kids making fun of me about being chubby, I was hurt by it and I just couldn't understand why they couldn't be nice to me. But my mother reminded me each and every day how beautiful I was and how much I mattered. As time went on and I went on from Elementary school, Junior High School , HS and even college, I always came across a girl talking about me or making fun of me. For years I would just pray about it, I won't lie I cursed some people out for it but what good would it do me. I learned that people didn't define or couldn't define who I was. I knew who I was, yes I am fat. So What? It may be some characteristics that people don't like about me but I will never change who I am to satisfy anyone.
When I started "Confidence Is You", I wanted to help women as well as motivate and inspire them to be better and do better. Some females with on talking about me for doing what I was doing instead of congratulating me. Like why can't we all support and be there for one another. Like why hate on other women doing her thing? I remember a few weeks ago watching the BET "Hip Hop Awards" and Brandy did a performance with Queen Latifah, MC Lyte and YOYo and I was so amazed on how the four of them were on stage just supporting each other and having a good time doing it. That is what sisterhood looks like, It made me smile and I just wished it was this way for all of us. I just wish we had the support and motivation from other women to push ourselves to do even better.
But it isn't like that and it won't ever be that way . No matter what you will always have a female talking sh*t about another female or just hating on them because they are doing better then them. Last week Tuesday (December 11th) I got back to NY from Florida and I had sandals and I knee high skirt. I didn't think of NY being cold and besides I was getting a car ride so I was fine. I decided to go get something to eat with my male best friend. As we got to the restaurant two girls sitting besides us was already giving me stares. I just ignored them, I wasn't going to feed into their BS because I knew they were staring at me for having a skirt and sandals on. Remember Confidence Is Me and I didn't give a F#&$. But anyways at the end of the night when I was leaving they were leaving as well so when we got on the escalator, one of the girls try to take a picture of me and her flash went off. When I tell you every bone in my body was on fire, I was ready to beat her ass. But I don't promote violence at all and that is not who I am.
My homeboy already knew that I was about to go off but I just started praying for her and then I asked her if she wanted to take a picture of me with my face in it. Because what was her point of trying to take my picture. Oh let me guess to put it on Instagram and write a caption saying if I knew how cold it was outside. Like it wasn't even that cold outside and if I wanted to wear a skirt and sandals with it being 0 degrees outside, that's my business.
See that's another thing about females, they don't know how to mind their business. They think they know it all and quick to judge someone without even knowing what that person is going though. I went on telling her how I just got off the plane after being somewhere that was 80 degrees, something she probably can't do. I kept it short with her, I refused for her to take me out of my character and go down to her level. All I can do is pray for her and continue to pray for her. It makes no sense coming out of character, cursing or slapping anyone just so they can get the worst out of you. I just couldn't believe it, I was angry but I had to calm myself down. She wasn't worth it at all for me to lose everything I have.
Some women will do anything and everything to take you out of character, I learned that. This is why I say never feed the haters with the attention they are seeking for from you. At times you just have to let it go, you're better than that. I never been the type to hate on another female or wish bad on them. I want all of us to make it and be about our sh*t.
Some women get hated on because of their skin tone, hair, job, relationship etc. Why? But it happens. All I can do is just Pray for us all and those with narrow minds and a negative spirit. Hating won't get anyone nowhere, it will just delay anyone from doing what they are suppose to do. No matter how much hate I get thrown my way I will always remain to be the person that I am today. I will continue to do what Iam doing, I will continue to inspire and motivate other women to be a better version of themselves and to do better.
Never stop being yourself for anyone, yes they will talk about you, they will hate on you, they will also wish the worst on you but never lose yourself, always be yourself and remember no one or nothing can stop what is meant for you. So let them hate and use their hate to be motivation for you. Once again never stop being who you are to satisfy anyone opinions of you.
A Confident Love From Me To You
Xoxo Yanika
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