It was extremely hard for me to open up to anyone and certain guys didn't have the patience to get to know me. You know once they can't get what they want sexually they not with it. There was one person I dated for awhile but I knew we wouldn't go anywhere but I got comfortable until one day I met my special someone. At first in my mind I said let me be his friend again. When I say again, the reason why is because I knew him for years prior but something was said which wasn't true but at the moment I believed it so I stop talking to him. But years later as I got matured and realized he was telling the truth, I started being nice and talking to him again.
At first it was nothing, I never knew that our first date would turn to a second date and a third date and so on. As time went on we got to know each other a little better and after a few months he wanted more but my guard was up and there was no way I was letting it down for anyone. A few months went by and he was still there patiently getting to know me and not what was between my legs. He did everything to see me smile, the feelings were there for him but I was scared. He promised that if I gave him a chance he wouldn't hurt me but I didn't believe him. It marked a year since we been dating, some felt as if I was crazy not to give him a chance but my heart couldn't handle anymore pain. I remember having a conversation with my mother and she stated " Not all guys are the same, you are going to let a good one go". I knew he was someone special and I needed to give him a chance. I needed to allow my heart to love again and I knew I deserved to be loved again. Every time I told myself I would give him a chance, the pain and memory of my broken heart made me put my guard up even more. I knew he was getting fed up because at this point it's been a year and a half. And what's so crazy is it got to the point I couldn't be without him, I needed to see him and speak to him frequently but I still didn't want to give him that commitment. I knew it wasn't fair to him because he did everything to make me smile from buying a perfume I asked for that I didn't expect him to buy for me for Christmas to buying tickets for me to see Wale a few times. He took me out every chance he got, he was there when I was frustrated and hurt. There were a few times I cried to him telling him I was scared and he understood. He was patient and that made me care deeply for him but what if I open my heart up to love again and he hurts me.
I took sometime to finally realize that not all guys are the same but things do happen. If something happened I knew that my heart would heal again because at this point my heart was healed but I was just scared. As I was reading some quotes one night I came across this quote from Maya Angelou and it said " have enough courage to trust love one more time", I read it over and over again and at that moment I knew I needed to trust love again with him. A couple weeks later was my book signing for my book "Confidence Is You"( which will be republished in August), I invited him and I was so excited to have all my love ones there with me celebrating such a big moment in my life. As I was sitting there talking about the book, he walked in and my heart smiled. As he waited on line to get his book signed I knew at that very moment I wanted to be with him. That was all the confirmation I needed.
I knew he was want I deserved and what god wanted for me. And Iam happy and thankful to say today marks OUR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY !!!! And with each and everyday that goes by I love him a little bit more and appreciate him more than the day before. Our relationship haven't been perfect but no relationship is perfect. As a couple you will disagree but you will learn to communicate and understand each other more.
Iam telling you my story to inspire you to love again and to give love a chance. We all deserve to be love, just because you got your heart broken in the past doesn't mean you aren't worthy of love. I was always the one to be in love with the idea of being in love, but what I learned is that I was giving my love to the wrong ones. Love will not be perfect, it isn't a fairytale or a storybook but you can make it your fairytale and write the chapters of your love story. Love is about challenges, communication and coming together to better the both of you guys in the relationship. Love is a four letter word, so easy to spell but something you can't live without. You deserve someone to be crazy about you and love you exactly for who you are inside and out. Things happen, tears will flow and your heart will get broken but never ever give up on love.
Being in love with someone as well as someone being in love with you is a blessing and gift from god. If you have it already, treasure it and if not be patient like I always say love will find you. Just wait don't rush, it's ok to be single. Just take that time to get to know you better. The love that is meant to happen will happen at the right place and the right time with the right person. I never believed that someone will take the time to heal my heart again and make me fall in love again. I don't know what the future holds for us, God has a plan for all of us. I do know I want to be by his side and just love him more as the days go by. So be patient by confident dolls, LOVE WILL FIND YOU!!!!!! You Are Worthy Of Love. Just trust in God and have Faith. I told my boyfriend today who would of thought I mean I can't believe we went from having matching Jordan's when we were teenagers to now taking trips together as adults being in love and making one year together. I truly believe this was god plan. And I believe it was, so to all my lovers don't give up, that heart of yours will be cherish by someone special. We just spent our first vacation in Vegas together, something I never shared with anyone before. I gave love a chance and Iam the happiest that I ever been.
To my love Thank You for making me the happiest girl ever, I trusted you and each and everyday Iam thankful that I did. Thank you for being you, you annoy me at times ( I know I do too lol) but I love you no matter what and believe when I say you got a ride or die cause Iam always gonna be right here by your side.Love is a hard task but most of all it's realizing that every hour, every minute and every second of it was worth it because we did it together. I Love You MJ, Happy 1 Year Anniversary ❤️
NEVER GIVE UP ON LOVE MY CONFIDENT Dolls, Love Won't Give Up On You!!!!!!!!
A Condident Love From Me To You
Xoxo Yanika
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